promises

prom·ise  (prms)

n.

1.

a. A declaration assuring that one will or will not do something; a vow.

b. Something promised.

2. Indication of something favorable to come; expectation: a promise of spring in the air.

3. Indication of future excellence or success: a player of great promise.

v. prom·ised, prom·is·ing, prom·is·es

v.tr.

1. To commit oneself by a promise to do or give; pledge: left but promised to return.

2. To afford a basis for expecting: thunderclouds that promise rain.

v.intr.

1. To make a declaration assuring that something will or will not be done.

2. To afford a basis for expectation: an enterprise that promises well.

we show love for each other by (among many things) making and keeping promises in the relationship. they can come in all shapes- from day-to-day behavior eg “i promise i’ll treat you better,” to concrete and specific tasks like “i promise to call you later,” and grand gestures such as “i’ll travel across the world just to see you!” romantic promises can easily make one feel like the other truly loves and cares for them. one who is promised something gets positive feelings, and if that promise is kept, the relationship is often strengthened. the risk is what happens when that promise is not fulfilled, or broken. however, once a promise is made, it’s really willpower that steers the behavior. many a times, love causes people to lead with feelings but not follow through. there might be an expectation of an ambitious and difficult promise to prove that love. while we desire to please each other, not everyone is good at time management (love may make the promise, but willpower keeps it). promises are comprised of verbal intent and task completion. being ambitious but having little self-discipline may not be enough to fulfill promises.
i guess a person cannot simply judge how much your partner loves you based on their ability to fulfill promises. it may be that your partner’s love may be fueling him/her to over-promise and hence, let you down.
however,  if we aim to have a relationship based on trust, we have to be consistent. we cannot get lazy, complacent, take each other for granted, or treat each other like shit (eg. turning off the phone, ignoring phone calls) because we think the other person will always be there. are you choosing then to contaminate or contribute to the relationship? sometimes we have to make an extra effort to show our partner that you are worthy of their trust, especially if they were hurt before. there may be times when you are tired or busy and you really don’t feel like following through or keeping your word. It may not seem like a big deal to you, but what are you trying to tell your partner by your inaction? well, simply this, "you’re not important, you’re not a priority to me." receiving that message doesn’t feel good and it hurts especially if your partner genuinely really cares.
it's very rare to find someone now who understands that a promise is a priority to get something done. and if you find them, treasure them. they are an endangered species.
and if you unfortunately have a partner who has a problem keeping promises, you can choose to live with it, or not.
me, i'm wearing thin and i dont think i deserve any of these i'm getting. no one does.
i don't even know why i'm writing all these logical and unbiased views when i'm feeling so unappreciated and tossed aside. i really don't. i do not deserve your mean words, i do not deserve being ignored. i do deserve a better person though. shrugs. we both made a mystaque.