and yes we're done!!!
finally finally! the 3months of play is here!!
pic editing in progress.
and so many movies to dl.
this is so awesome.

praying like mad that tmr wont rain.
USS ftw!
excitedddd. heehee.

one by one, slowly but surely, we are gonna strike off stuff from our holiday to-do list. (:

just 11.5 more hours to the end!
the wait is terribly torturous!!
grrr!!
can totally see myself slacking around like a piece of tofu! yessssss.
but the first thing i really wanna do... like immediately immediately after exam, is to pick up a tennis racket again and start whacking some balls man.
hoping that i can do that tmr. omg. SCREW RUNNING. SCREW SWIMMING.esp screw running.
hate running like seriously. hahaah.
i'd rather be a piece of tofu than go run. -.-
all the girls in class are going for the stupid nike run and they have unsuccessfully persuaded me to go. puh leese..-.-

sleepy ttm.
ok goodnight world.
by the time u wake up, im slacking/partying/movieing/tofuing
yessssssssss.
FULL MARKS FTW. hellyeah (for the first 80 marks that is.) screw last 2 qn.

simply cant wait for mon 1130. heehee.
i know its gonna be over quickly and then there wont be the excitement of wanting something to be over so bad. but still.. mon please come quick. :D

had a scary, ghostly dream last night.
pretty cool when i actually thought abt it.
had elements of my sec sch life, jc life and uni life such as the people involved. and had elements of my wants and thoughts.
cool (:

on another note,
i also think i look damn cool now.
i look like the fire guy in the avatar. forgot his name. think its zuko. the bad guy. hahaha.
i look into the mirror and actually think i like my new "eyeshadow" thanks ah mother. u make me look so pwweeettyy. so pweetty i dont wanna go to church to show my new look. :D

anw, thanks for protecting me and making me feel safe.
and for taking me away from the crap. always seem to happen at the worst times eh.


I Will Rise
Chris Tomlin

There's a peace I've come to know
Though my heart and flesh may fail
There's an anchor for my soul
I can say "It is well"

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

[Chorus:]
And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

There's a day that's drawing near
When this darkness breaks to light
And the shadows disappear
And my faith shall be my eyes

Jesus has overcome
And the grave is overwhelmed
The victory is won
He is risen from the dead

[Chorus:]
And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

And I hear the voice of many angels sing,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
And I hear the cry of every longing heart,
"Worthy is the Lamb"
[x2]

[Chorus:]
And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise

after all the worrying and all the nonsense that came with the worrying, im relieved and really glad to say that everything's fine now.
but yet it makes me wonder,
does God have to take all that trouble of making us worry so much, so that we will be needy and finally go to Him, begging for mercy? Why do all that just to get us back to His side? Why doesnt He just give up, leave us be, let us stray and die as sinners?
in the bible, matt 18: 12,14 reads, "..If a man owns a hundred sheep, and one of them wanders away, will he not leave the ninety-nine and go to look for the one that wandered off?...In the same way, your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost."

I'm guilty for straying for the past few months. but He has successfully gotten me back to His side in His own way and it really feels so good to be back in His arms once again.

This episode, though considerably short, felt like a really long period of time. i believe its simply coz it happened during this exam period. Knowing how exam periods are like, feels like its never gonna end eh. So yes, i think i can say that i've been worrying for a reallllyyy long time! from all the worrying, my studies were inevitably affected, attention was constantly diverted back to the what-if scenario, and at night, sleep didnt come easy, and even if it did, it wouldnt be a peaceful one, leaving me still tired the next day. yet, by His grace and mercy, i've been able to study, thought not alot, but enough, just enough to allow me to answer all the questions rather alright today. once again, i know i should be studying for the next paper tmr, but i just want to announce to the world the goodness and faithfulness of God.

Through this, it not only brought bubs and i closer to God, it also brought the both of us closer to each other and from now on, we're gonna honour the pact that bubs made to God. bubs doesnt know but i actually prayed the same thing. hee. so yes. im really glad we are gonna honour the pact and im really excited to see what else God has in stored for us. Thank you bubs, for staying with me through this. loves.

anw 2 more to go. after tmr can party alr actually. heehee. cant wait!

Yes, i serve a faithful God.

RAWRSSS. clarissa is hungry!
waiting for bubs to take me out for lunch.

had an hour-long super duper interesting phonecall with cc ytd.
it feels.. comforting to know.. someone really understands coz that person has been through the exact same situation as you and felt the exact same way and thought the exact same things and did the exact same research hahaah.
but the sucky feeling that we keep trying to push away.. the worrying.. its smth we never thought we'd feel. and the conversations are those we'd never ever thought we would have.


if my witness reads this: im sorry, ive torn it and thrown it away, coz it is meaningless to keep something which i couldnt keep.
you may have forgotten what we exchanged signatures and phone numbers for. im not sure if you are still keeping that card that we got in j1. but it used to mean so much to me and i was so darn sure i will never have to discard it. but now i have and im sorry.



if that's gonna be the punishment.. its soso much more than i can bear.

has anybody noticed this? when you're nearing the exams and you're just a few days away from the end, you start getting distracted thinking about all the things you are gonna do once the exams are over? that's fine. but then you start remembering also all the things you have not done and suddenly have the strong urge to do them. eg. reply a "friend's" email which was sent long ago. and you also do the most time-wasting thing in the world like blog..
and the best part is,
when the exams ARE actually over, you somehow just dont feel like doing all the things you had wanted to do and just go party all the way.
it has always been this way for me since psle. irritating ttm.

ok im really just bored of studying. although my study plan for today was a total failure coz i'd rather do smth else than study duh. anything but study. probably only studied for 1/3 of what i set out to do. and i dont think i'll be able to accomplish much tmr either.
will be so zzz after lunch. and then zzz for the rest of the day as usual. grr.

next sem.
we are so gonna work our asses off.
(:

ps. missing you.

somebody's being such a piggy!
and bargaining with me about the time i should call him up.
and im alr done with breakfast and devo and 1 set of cardio. :P
'845 can pls?' HAHA.
its a saturday so i think i shall be nice.

yay chiong day. 12 hours here we go. :D with peeing, bathing, eating, slacking time taken into consideration. 8am- 11pm.

to do:
- ALL physio.

FIGHTING! *naruto rising fighting spirit song plays in the background*

[edit]
oh ho these are the replies i got from my parents when i told them about the crazy stunt i pulled ytd.

daddy: i trust yr decision. jia oil!!!
mummy: u decide lor.

hahaha. nice.
[/edit]

cant wait for tmr!!
coz im SOOO hungry! wanna eat yummy breakfast! hee!

excitingzxxzzx day today i must say(:
tried new things!

yeah first time paying 48 for stuff i dont need -.- i only need the paper and not whatever that comes w it. and i happily walked out forgetting what i didnt need. which was hmm.. kinda obvious. HAHAAH.

anw im worried.
i want yet i dont want. next time not now.
):
i'll give u 10more days.

ok i dont know what im talking about... sleepy... but i know tmr gonna wake at 6.15 for fun whee!

oh yay sign lang and dance during holssss!

NEEDS TO WHINE.
so so angsty right now.
RAWRR!!!

so this was what happened.
i was bored from mugging, so i started fiddling around with my GC.
then suddenly thought of binomial in finite math. links it to the GC i was holding.
"HEY! GC CAN SOLVE BINOMIAL!!!!!"
tries to recall what was taught in jc.
went to search my whole GC, pressing random buttons.
finally found it. under 2ndf vars.(distr)
then scrolled down to see what i can find.
found binomcdf linked to cumulative distributive function, so just pressed it.
rmb had to key in 3 functions.
so played ard till i friggin got the answer.
SO DAMN HAPPY!
"YESSSSSSS!!!!!!!"
then rmb..
"eh? finite maths can use GC??"
went to check.

im sure any bloody fool would know the answer i got.

hooray.......

dont know if its a good or bad thing but sometimes, i feel im like my dad.
saw him exceptionally clearly in me ytd.

big decision needs to be made, quickly considers pros and cons, makes the decision never to look back, faces whatever consequence that may come from that decision, good or bad.
somehow i feel its pretty much like him.
ok i agree it could be a bad thing in making decisions so quickly coz there might be the possibility that not all options were thoroughly considered, but when i made the final call ytd, i felt totally at peace and relieved. it was a peace that i couldnt explain and i thank God for giving me the courage to finally take my stand.
and i actually feel proud of myself tbh haha. well, coz.. im willing to face the consequences.
worse case scenario, expelled. pay back 1 year sch fees and salary. but.. what is the probability of that happening man.

oh that reminds me. i havent told my parents.
but i know they wont scold me or anything coz i DO know exactly what im doing. and even if they do, its MY school life and i DO know how to go about doing things that will help me.
resorting to this isnt smth to be proud of but im fine with it so long as i get what i set out to achieve at the end of 4 years.

i hope to look back after i graduate and say with smile, these were the 2 jokers that stuck by me, tested the school system and got out of it scratch-free. really glad to have them in my life, making school life so much less mundane and i believe what we are gonna do will the first and last time we get to do it till forever.

now.
one last important question for clarissa.
which clinic will you be going to?

A for number theory.
gpa? not 5.00.

some horrible singing going on downstairs right now..sheesh. -.-
bubs would do so much better.
phail! he just forgot the lyrics wth. i'd rather be in lecture listening to hwk now. this is torturing the whole hall man.
AND PPL ACTUALLY CHEERED. -.-

20 more days to the end!
hohoho.
cant wait!

much as i dont want to go for dinner with the family, i shall drag myself there coz tumbi's bringing me back to hall!
wanna study, but eating crab and studying will never ever go tgt unless somebody peels the crab for me. but clarence isnt hereeee. boo.. can sense its gonna be boring. sigh
and i cant camwhore much coz firstly, i dont even wanna bother dressing up, and secondly, my cam has one bar of batt left! great.

i wanna finish up lab report by tonight!
done with als and ict! yessss.
after physio report, its down to studying for finite maths test on wed.
after wed. its 10 days to study/practice number theory. dont think there's time..

grah im sorry all my posts are on counting down, exams and assignments.
hhahha. gimme 22 more days. and then there wont be anymore stuff like these till 7months' time? :D


still amazed at how you work your magic.
just a phonecall and problem solved.
think its the sincerity in your voice that melts my heart each time. haha.
i know what i gotta work on.
please dont spoil me with all your magic.
(:

RANDOM POST!

at amk lib with zj and bryan doing ICT.
hahaha. just bored!!!
:P